Writers and musicians often wax poetic about their love of drink, so it’s no surprise that they have some choice words about hangovers as well. While Hemingway and Hunter S. Thompson can provide positive guidance on how to drink to inspire your next great work of literature, sometimes you just need someone to commiserate with about you how bad you feel after a long night out. Here are our favorite quotes about hangovers, which may help ease the morning pain just a little.
When that ineffable compound of depression, sadness (these two are not the same), anxiety, self-hatred, sense of failure and fear for the future begins to steal over you, start telling yourself that what you have is a hangover. You are not sickening for anything, you have not suffered a minor brain lesion, you are not all that bad at your job, your family and friends are not leagued in a conspiracy of barely maintained silence about what a sh*t you are, you have not come at last to see life as it really is and there is no use crying over spilt milk.
A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.
I think that—that anyone, the painter, the musician, the writer works in a—a kind of an—an insane fury. He’s demon-driven. He can get up feeling rotten, with a hangover, or with—with actual pain, and—and if he gets to work, the first thing he knows, he don’t remember that pain, that hangover—he’s too busy.
P.G. Wodehouse, The Mating Season
I am told by those who know that there are six varieties of hangover—the Broken Compass, the Sewing Machine, the Comet, the Atomic, the Cement Mixer and the Gremlin Boogie, and his manner suggested that he had got them all.
Happiness is waking up without a hangover.
I like to change liquor stores frequently because the clerks got to know your habits if you went in night and day and bought huge quantities. I could feel them wondering why I wasn’t dead yet and it made me uncomfortable. They probably weren’t thinking any such thing, but then a man gets paranoid when he has 300 hangovers a year.
Matt Haig, The Humans
If getting drunk was how people forgot they were mortal, then hangovers were how they remembered.
Jojo Moyes, Me Before You
Sometimes when you get hammered till the small hours you feel pretty good in the morning, but really it's just because you're still a bit drunk. That old hangover is just toying with you, working out when to bite.
Cormac McCarthy, Suttree
His head was pounding and his vision skewed in some way and he was vaguely amazed at being alive and not sure that it was worth it.
Neil Gaiman, Anansi Boys
Fat Charlie was thirsty and his head hurt and his mouth tasted evil and his eyes were too tight in his head and all his teeth twinged and his stomach burned and his back was aching in a way that started around his knees and went up to his forehead and his brains had been removed and replaced with cotton balls and needles and pins which was why it hurt to try and think, and his eyes were not just too tight in his head but they must have rolled out in the night and been reattached with roofing nails; and now he noticed that anything louder than the gentle Brownian motion of air molecules drifting softly past each other was above his pain threshold. Also, he wished he were dead.
Don't trust a brilliant idea unless it survives the hangover.
Alex Shakar, Luminarium
He dozed off, into a dreamless oblivion, for what seemed like seconds but was in fact hours, and awoke hungover, the inner surface of his skull pulsing like a single, giant nerve being chewed by some ruminant animal.
Mark Lawrence, Prince of Fools
Some hangovers are so horrific that it seems the whole world rocks and sways around you, the very walls creaking with the motion. Others are relatively mild and it just turns out that in your drunkenness, a collection of Vikings have thrown you onto a heap of coiled ropes in their longship and set to sea.